Asking questions about youth can open a conversation about friendships, studies, work or changes. That stage of life was not necessarily free, happy or daring. Ask about a memory the person wants to share, without looking for a single explanation of the life that followed.
School and friends
- What were your school years like? Were you studious or a troublemaker?
- Who was your best friend? What did the two of you get up to?
- Which song defined your youth?
Dreams and first steps
- What did you want to be when you grew up?
- What was your first job, and what was the experience like?
- Did you leave home early? What was that independence like?
The big turning points
- What was the most important decision you made when you were young?
- What would you do differently, if you could?
Questions like these complement our questions to learn your family’s history and help build a complete portrait of a life.
The young person inside the older one
Asking about youth can reveal sides of someone beyond the role they hold in the family today. There is room for dreams, doubts, routine and topics the person prefers not to share. A short conversation may be enough, and the subject can wait for another day.
Youth does not have to be the happiest time
Ask about school, work, friendships and the paths the person chose, without assuming that time was free or daring. For someone living in Canada, the story may include a move to another province, arriving in the country or staying in the community where they grew up. There is room for doubts and stretches without big events. When a memory is difficult, the person can change the subject or continue another time.
A photo, a ticket stub or a letter can help choose a topic, if the person wants. Ask what the object brings to mind and who was there. When combining the account with other chapters, note the stage of life and keep approximate dates as approximate. There is no need to turn every memory into a definitive explanation of who the person became.
Further reading: StoryCorps — great questions.