Choosing questions for a long-time couple starts with agreeing on how each person wants to take part. They may prefer to talk together, separately or at different times. There is no need to sum up decades in one visit: choose one memory at a time and note who tells each version, without requiring one to complete or confirm the other.
How it all began
- Where and how did you meet? Describe that day.
- What was your first impression of each other?
- How did the proposal happen?
What kept you together
- What was the hardest stretch you got through together?
- What has each of you learned from the other over the years?
- What is your secret, if there is one?
Looking back
- What are you proudest of as a couple?
- What advice would you give a couple just starting out?
Questions like these yield a shared life story, full of details the children rarely know.
From conversation to gift
Together, these answers become an unforgettable golden anniversary gift — the couple’s story, told by the couple themselves.
Give both voices a place
Listening to a couple together can reveal details that emerge in the exchange; talking separately may also be one partner’s preference. In Canada or anywhere else, the story of a relationship does not need to have the same interpretation for both people. Agree on the format beforehand and note who tells each memory. Difficult topics can stay out of the recording without diminishing the value of the stories they chose to share.
Further reading: Oral History Association — participants.